"New Dating Profile -- Update!"

 

I snagged a date! Well, drinks with this woman who had one of those bull ring nose piercings and a bunch of face tattoos -- she kind of looked like a female Post Malone, but heinous. Totally heinous.

Anyway, the date was going pretty well and she presented me with this small pentagram painting (pictured left), which I guess she just brought with her, if things got hot and heavy. (As a woman in this modern era, you gotta be prepared to seal the deal with a pentagram painting.) 

She invited me back to her "layer," as she put it. And I said yes and started following her there in my car and then ditched her and got some late-night ice cream. She probably would have sacrificed me to the Dark Lord, but it was still a date and I got a pentagram painting, ice cream, and lived. Complete success!