"Top 5 Heroes"

1. Hulk Hogan
2. Mr. T
3. Evel Knievel
4. Storm Shadow
5. Richard Simmons

"She Blinded Me With Science"

"Caveman Pool Party"

"The Perfect Crime"

"He's A Skeleton Man"

"Coming Soon To A Theater Near You"

"My Top 5 Comedy Moments of 2010"

1. Release of John Rafferty's America on DVD.

2. Premiere of "Love Is A Battlefield" at Connie's Ric Rac.

3. Catch-22 show at Helium.

4. "The Celebration" (see below)

5. Mike Score constantly berating random people that we drive by.

"The Celebration"

"Hey, Billy Joel"

"A Real Fish Story"

F

"Today's Hero"

Cuidado Piso Mojado, who spent his life slipping on wet floors in order to raise wet-floor awareness, died today after a battle with old age. He was 84. Memorials (like the one pictured left) were set-up on wet floors across the country in his honor.
A fallen hero who shant be forgotten.

"My New Invention!"

It's the change bag!!!

• Holds up to nine dollars in change! 
• See-through design allows for greater change visibilty!
• Lifetime guarantee!

    

Only 29.95!
(while supplies last)
                                                                

"Recession Hits He-Man Hard!"

"He-Man is not the master of the universe; he's not even the master of his own finances! Finally, the Castle Grayskull is mine!"

"Plans For Next Thanksgiving"

"Anti-Climactic Moments In History"

Custard's second-to-last stand was considerably less well-attended than his last stand.

"What Could Of Been"

"The Chevy Impaler"

"Trugreen Sample Ad #3"

Last ad sample for my class. This one targets 45-and-over crowd, male and female. I suppose any blues fans, as well.

"Swamp Thing (featuring Prince)"

"Trugreen Sample Ad #2"

Second sample ad for my high school advertising project. This one is geared to teenagers and rock 'n' roll types, with an emphasis on the male demographic.

"Philosophy of Farful"

The first thing you wanna do when you get out of jail is go bowling. Then commit another crime before you get too rusty.

"Trugreen Sample Ad #1"

For my high school advertising class. This sample ad is geared to the 15 - 35 male and female demographic. It is the least specifically-targeted ad of my campaign.

"Skeleton With A Mustache, That Loves To Chat It Up!"

"'Leather Gods' by The KMX Band"

The newest video from The KMX Band.

"Dylan Does 'Charles In Charge' Theme Song"

"Love Is Stupid" (Animated Metal Version)

"Skeleton Makes Good"

Old skeleton was the town's reject. A total schlub. He had a dead-end job, no woman, and he lived in a shed. Worst of all, he was alone; no friends, no kin to speak of. When he wasn't working or living in his shed, he would walk about town, trying to be a part of it. But who would want anything to do with a bony old skeleton? It seemed his fate was sealed. He entered the bank to make a meager deposit, when he discovered the joint was gettin' stuck up. A robber had the fat, fat-headed manager at gunpoint. Old bony skeleton charged the burglar. What did he have to lose? Besides, maybe if he saved the fat-headed manager, he could get a job at the bank -- a real step up from his job at the laundry mat. The burglar was so taken by surprise that he shrieked like a little girl, tossing the fat man to the side, as old skeleton tackled him  to the ground. Old skeleton got shot, but it went right through. The cops came and arrested the prick, and old skeleton was a hero.  

"The House That TV Built!"

As everyone knows, I've always had a certain flare for architecture: As a kid, I was always fascinated by the "architect's" home -- that house in a neighborhood that stuck out like a sore thumb that was clearly designed by its architect owner, usually futuristic in an original Star Wars sense, kind of a sci-fi expression of what we hoped the future would be like, inadequately expressed with what we had at the present -- and the upside-down house that baffled me until a really mean girl at a bar, who was an architect, broke it down for me. Not a day goes by that I don't wish I had punched that girl in the face. Not a day. What a jerk, she was.

So, it should come as no surprise that the same genius mind that came up with "The House With Wings" (me) has now conjured up this masterpiece: The House That TV Built! (In all honesty, this is a really amazing and groundbreaking genius idea that needs to be carried out. Seriously.) My idea is to design a house from my favorite exterior, and rooms, from past TV shows. I'm talkin' exact replicas, put together, to form the most incredible pop culture feat in architectural history. Check it out:

Exterior: "Empty Nest"

Boys Bedroom: "Diff'rent Strokes"

 Girls Bedroom: "Clarissa Explains It All"

Kitchen/TV Area: "The Hogan Family"

Master Bedroom: "The Cosby Show"

Bathrooms: "Beverly Hills 90210" (one where Kelly Kapowski smoked pot)

Basement: "Full House" (especially when Uncle Jesse converted it into a recording studio)

Main Room: "My Two Dads"

Garage: "Alf"

Study: "Silver Spoons"

Hallways: "Saved By The Bell"

"Shameless Self-Promotion"

Follow my blog with bloglovin

"This Is What I See In My Head"

"Happened Today"

This guy was washing the windows outside McDonald's and this pretty woman walked up. "My name's Derek. Can I call you sometime? Can you call me?" She didn't go for it, but I was thinkin': Man, he's smooth.

"Philosophy of Farful"

Anytime you see a lemonade stand, stop and buy a glass. If you don't, you'll crush a kid's entrepreneurial spirit.

"Revenge Of The Chocolate Moose!"

"The Lethal Weapon Blues"

"Surf's Up!"

The mice are surfing! So is the dog! Surf's up, dudes!

"Another Classic!"

What did the trash can do when it got angry?
It flipped its lid!

"The Origin of Cabin Fever"

The first reported "case" of cabin fever dates back to 1862.

The Jecks, an early frontier family, built a log cabin out of bulsum wood, the bark of which was infected with saratosis, a white moss-like fungus. Over the winter months, the saratosis caused their skin to break out in a painfully itchy, burning rash. It got so bad that they finally fled and were discovered by surveyors, passed out in the snow. The Jecks eventually recovered, but their fevers were from the colds they caught while lying in the snow, not the cabin.

"The Jokes Keep Coming!"

Why was the drunkard looking forward to jail?
Because he heard there were a lot of bars in prison!

"Bride of Funkenstein"

"The Busking Song"

"A Tribute To The Great Kat"

"Untitled Work"

"I Might Have To Write My Own Joke Book!"

What did the cow say to the person sitting who was sitting too close to him?
"Mooooooove over!"

"It's On!"

"My New Look"

STRAIGHT-OUT, this is my new look.
I'm Magic Marc.

"Trent Reznor's Answering Machine"

"Evil Judge Is Blowin' Up!"

"My New Joke"

Totally original:
"What did the dentist say to the dog?
 Let me see those canines."

"Farewell, Creep Jeep"

As many of you already know, my car, The Creep Jeep, was sent to the boneyard. I had a lot of near-death experiences in that vehicle, my favorite being when I was almost shot and killed with an M-16. I'm serious. My new car doesn't have a nickname yet, has a spoiler, and I will not love it the same way I did the ol' Creep Jeep. Farewell, old friend. And for old time's sake, the following:




I'll miss ya, buddy.

"THE KMX BAND"

Our debut album, "Sacred Cheese," is now available on iTunes. Check it out! Write a review! Tell your friends!

"Top Eleven Greatest Guitar Solos"

1. "Sugarcube" Yo La Tengo
2. "Cult of Personality" Living Colour
3. "Unchained" Van Halen
4. "Annihilate This Week" (live version) Black Flag
5. "Tomorrow" Siliverchair
6. "In the Garage" Weezer
7. "Backwater" Meat Puppets
8. "Maggot Brain" Funkadelic
9. "In Bloom" Nirvana
10. "Unbelievable" EMF
11. "Play That Funk Music, White Boy" Wild Cherry

"Sir Refuse"

There's an awesome part in Janitor 1 where the janitor's "go-to" trash can, Sir Refuse, comes to life and helps him battle a bunch of bad guys.

Love Is A Battlefield

Our short film. http://vimeo.com/12418948

"I'm Insane"

"Project: Evil Judge"

I've always thought people's head shots looked ridiculous and/or lame, and how great it would be to have an off-the-wall head shot. So what I did was buy a wig and take that, and the gown I had from my college graduation, and then got a really cheap head shot done:

Then I sent it to every casting call I could with the following note:

P.S. Do you have any roles for an evil judge?

"Love Is A Battlefield (Trailer)"

Trailer for our new movie!

"Philosophy of Farful"

If you don't got it, flaunt it.

"Philosophy of Farful"

Sometimes your clothes will get a bad energy and you need to burn them.

"Our Newest Member"

Pictured to the left is the newest member of the Catch-22 family, Alan Kaufman. Alan thinks he's better than us -- and we'd have to agree: Whether he's sporting his trademark V-neck or insulting me, he's got that eliteness, better-than-you quality. Alan . . . welcome to the fold. Your comeuppance is right around the corner.

"Thought of the Day"

You know when you're walking through the bed section of a department store?  How great would it be to see someone conked out in one of the beds.

"The News Today" by Bill Hicks

"I Always Wanted A Craftmatic Bed"

"How Does It Feel?" by Bill Hicks

"Tim Wamblaum"

"Stock Footage: The Movie" (Trailer)

"Death's Lament/Crunch Mode" by Bill Hicks

"Shout" by Bill Hicks

"Karate Man" by Bill Hicks

"I Front" by Herb Bermann's Side Project

"Philosophy of Farful"

Never sleep with your socks on: bad energy is released through your feet. That's why people in countries without shoes are healthier.

"Competitive Eating" by Everyone Needs A George

"I Hate You"

"The Problem With Love"

"Please Come Back"

"Philosophy of Farful"

When choosing a motel, go with a HoJo: They've got free HBO.

"Philosophy of Farful"

Negative thoughts will build you a home of self-doubt.

"Surreal Moment"

My driver's ed instructor showed us "License To Drive" as part of our curriculum.

"Old Man in B Major for Saxophone"

"Need A Lawyer?"

"Philosophy of Farful"

The best kind of forest is an enchanted one.

"Warpath"

"Willner Will Rock You"

"Leap Year 2: Did You Hear About My Colonial Wife?"

"Godzilla Got A Raw Deal, A RAW DEAL!"

"Message to KMX"

"A Tear for Farkaharsen"

"A Little Comic Relief from Janitor 1"

After janitor turns down his old commanding officer's request to save the school, the janitor is in his room playing "Jaws" on Nintendo. Phone rings. Janitor answers: "Pizza Time." "Come on, man. Just do it." his old CO says from his military-styled study. "What time is it?" the janitor asks. CO looks at the digital clock on his desk. "3:37 p.m." The janitor looks over at an unopened "Make-Your-Own Sun Dial" kit, and sighs. "Alright, I'm in."

"January 24th, 2010"

Sunday. 6:07 p.m. Burger King.

Eating, plotting my next move. It's nice to know that death is so near, comforting that I'm just another statistic.

"Why I Wasn't In Apocalypse Now"

"The Really, *Really* Strange Side of Farful"

"The Sensitive Side of Farful"

"Medically Speaking"

I suffer from a rare disease where my socks always feel too tight: tightsockitis.

"FAT BLACK CAT"

"Fort Lauderdale"