"Philosophy of Farful"

Best Western is a quality establishment. So even if you stay at the worst Best Western, it will be a positive experience.

Lesson: The worst of the best is still fantastic!

"I Think That Would Be Fantastic!"

I'd like to have a closet in my house that's full of skeletons -- not real ones; fake ones. But, literally, a closet just full of skeletons. I think that would be fantastic!

"Philosophy of Farful"

Let us consider our enemies: Do they hate us, or do they hate themselves? Take for instance, Skeletor's hatred for He-Man. Skeletor's a total cokehead, so does he hate He-Man, or is he always just so jacked-up on coke that he hates everybody? Plus, he's livin' an ultimately lonely life in his Castle Grayskull. He has material goods, yes, but what of his spiritual wealth? None. Thus the source of his hatred. Thus the source of his enemies. Today's lesson: Your greatest enemy may just be your most unhappiest best friend in waiting.  

"The Greatest Scene In Cinematic History"

"I'd Like To . . . "

I'd like to meet and become friends with an incredibly vain homeless guy, who, despite the fact he lives in a trash can, really takes care of himself.